BADASS Dash

Who’s bad? In my Michael Jackson voice. I am, BADASS that is!! POW!
OMG I completed a 7k Obstacle Course!! Me, Bliss!!!! I was so nervous about it, I mean I’ve only done 1 5k in the past and that was about 3 years ago. And that it was just a traditional 5k. But this was a 7k with 20, count’em 20 BADASS Obstacles!! These obstacles had names like Wicked Wall, Feared Float, Hellacious Hurdles, Pallet Plunge and laustrophobic Crawl, just to name a FEW.

Come and take this journey with me. I rise at 5:15am (didn’t want to be late). The registration was an unexpected breeze. Then on to a few pre race pictures, checked out the other challenge participants and tried to calm my nerves! Our heat was 9am but we decided to go early, no point in putting it off! So we started at 8:40a. Sooo we’re OFF!! Did I mention I don’t run, lmao!! But I did trot for a bit! 1st challenge is now in sight haul a 30lb sand bag…from here to there. Then I used a rope to scale the side of a mountain, that wasn’t to bad. Next over the river and thru the woods to get to the next obstacle! I had sooo much fun! From there I crawled on my elbows and belly and rolled under a chain link low-lying thingy for about 30 yards ( I’m guessing). Next moved on to over and under hurdles and barrels! I climbed several WALLS of pallets. On my way down the backside of the walls of pallets dude that was minding this obstacle says “Just let go and drop”, I give him the side eye as a dangled from the top of the pallets. Umm nope I need a foothold so I can climb down! “No just drop!!” Da hell you SAY!! I managed to make it through all three walls without “Just dropping”. I scaled 3 or 4 stonewalls going uphill, did a tire obstacle and BACK through the woods! This is where the fun begins; we come to this inflatable it’s huge. We are supposed to go thru (like climbing thru boxing ring ropes, except they are about 3ft in diameter and they touch; then over the “wall” in the middle. Bae-bay, I laughed so hard I lost my breath trying to get over that wall. I rolled on a few people who joined me in my quest, lol lol. I eventually made it with a bit of assistance ( by assistance I mean the volunteer that was at that obstacle , hoisted my ass to the top of the wall, and over I went. Then there was the cargo net… I actually felt like that one was easy; it was about 2 stories high, I actually posed for pictures on that one lol. Up one side and down the other, no worries. Then more trotting and walking. Several obstacles are conquered. Then the first water challenge. (o_O) This consisted of walking slap middle of this ummm river/creek. The water was frigid!! My feet immediately became numb. It became increasingly deeper, first only to my feet then knees, then my, my cooter! Yeah, I said cooter lol lol. I’m getting nervous I’m only 5′ nothing. The mud feels like quicksand and I’m squeezing my toes in my shoes praying my shoes don’t come off. Out of nowhere… “Hole” I’m now nipple deep and struggle to keep my balance… Reaching… But for what? Not a damn thing within reach!! BUT, I don’t go down. Finally, I make it to the end and crawl(yes crawl out)! My shoes are now heavy with mud and water, and I can tell the difference. My lower body is now heavy. Next, more over the river and thru the woods… thru the woods… And THRU the woods!! Next obstacle, I ascended a hill on my BACK using a cargo net that was on top of me. It was wet and slippery and to make things worst they made it rain on me!! I completed the obstacle without problems. Then I got yelled at by a PRETEND DI… MOVE YOUR ASS YOU WILL NOT WALK ACROSS MY FIELD..RUN RUN…THIS IS NOT A STROLL..RUN!! Now he obviously does not know I don’t RUN!! And I am tired and I have 17 obstacles in my rear view mirror. Lil boy you better move outta my way. SHIT, my ass is TIRED now!! More yelling and more walking…humph! Then I hear him say, you, you, you, and you drop and give me 10!! 10 WHAT?! PUSH-UPS !! I give him serious side eye action. I know I’m old enough to be this boys mom!! I did give him his 10 then trotted off his damn field!! Lmao!! More obstacles are conquered! Next water obstacle! Eyes cross and wonder why did I decide to do this?! This obstacle looked like they had stringed together these floating milk crates to cross from one side of the river to the next! I saw one dude lose his balance and go in the water, his ass disappears when he falls in and he must be 6′!! A moment of panic sets in!! I look right and left no other way to get across! I take slow deliberate steps not giving a rats ass… about those behind me, saying “Just go for it!!” “If you go fast it’s easier.” Phiss, you go fast when it’s your turn! That 6′ man went UNDER! I am NOT Trey Songz… I am NOT about to DIVE IN! I am now on my knees crawling across, no shame in my game, hell, I’m tryna live! I make it to the last crate and you know what happened!! I’m not even going to say it! Crawled out onto the bank thankful I didn’t drown! That was the last obstacle. YAY, I did it!! The finish line is in sight!! I get my trot on climb a boulder wall and cross the finish line!! Praise God I did it!! I DID IT!! ALL 20 obstacles!! I can’t tell you how proud I am of myself. Rocky, at the top of the steps comes to mind 🙂 (Eye of the Tiger plays in my head). I want to do another. I had so much fun with my friend Monica and so glad she decided to sign up with me!! She came all the way from Columbus. She was AWESOME! I’m tired but still psyched, reflective and proud. I feel like I can do anything now.

Advertisements

Forbidden Fruit Friday

After seeing the trailer for Tyler Perry’s new flick, Temptation: Confessions of a Marriage Counselor, it made me begin to think. There was one line in particular that stood out for me, when main character, Judith, says, “I want to feel alive, and I want to feel wanted”, I was thinking ding ding, nail on the head. That is such a powerful statement. A moment of silence please, while we allow THAT to sink in; close your eyes and bow your heads…NO, really:-) Okay now inhake through your nose and exhale, through your mouth.

Being that I am a woman and I know women, I think it’s safe to say that is an accurate statement. And I’m sure it’s true for most men as well. Dare I say it’s more than a want, it’s a need we have; regardless of who you are. I’m daring so I yes, it is. Speaking for myself YES, I want to feel ALIVE and I want to feel WANTED, and DESIRED and all that goes along with that. Nope I’m not ashamed to say it out loud.
In keeping with what this movie is about, if you are in a relationship that has soured, or stagnated, or became predictable; you are not feeling alive or wanted. Now you and find yourself staring at Temptation, and it becomes overpowering and difficult to resist. Sometimes even if you are in a “Happy” relationship temptation can be wickedly powerful. Sometimes it’s just the excitement of something new a different; The Forbidden Fruit, if you will.

First lets define the word: Temptation
1. the act of influencing by exciting hope or desire;
2. something that seduces or has the quality to seduce
3. something that entices or allures
4. the desire to do something that you know you should avoid

I don’t know about you all but all of those definitions sound just a little sexy. Or it could just be me and MY way of thinking. Hell, makes me WANT to be tempted..lol. (Fans self) IJS. Whether you choose to admit it or not we have all been tempted in the same way Judith seems to have been in movie. For ME there’s something sexy,exciting and almost intoxicating about temptation. Good or bad it definitely makes you feel alive. It heightens your senses the air around you becomes electric, every cell in your body is awakened. Don’t judge me, and don’t act like you don’t know what I mean! It doesn’t have to mean you were married but I do mean in a relationship. For some it could mean it was waaaay back in high school. I know some you may have to go back that far, ( like Betty Wright says it may take some of longer to get there)but go on and go…relive that excitement for a sec. Some of you can go back to last year, last month, or maybe even yesterday, umm hum it’s okay either way. If you have to travel back to high school, this is what I mean, when your parents told you, you could not see” Andrew” but you snuck around school and held his hand or stole kisses on the way home, you felt that adrenaline rush, that excitement, you were seduced by him and secretiveness of the situation, you were TEMPTED, Boo, remember the definition! You knew it was wrong but you wanted him, and you felt a rush every time you got away with seeing him. It’s that same rush as adults, you know it’s wrong but temptation is strong, seductive, and exciting. We do it either for the reasons I mentioned before or 1 or 2 of these, chemistry, lust, thrills, or a shared secret.

Let me get somewhat sidetracked for a moment. The secret itself is seductive KNOWING you know something that everyone else is clueless about, just you and the other person, it’s thrilling. Why is it you think most can’t keep a secret. It’s so exciting, and thrilling there is so much energy associated with it; and that feeling of I know something you don’t. Most of the time it’s to much for people to handle. It takes a SPECIAL person to keep secrets, nice or naughty. I could write a blog post about secrets.

Temptation and come from people and situations you never expected, never dreamed of, but boom one day there he is staring you in the face…what do you do? Will you travel that road of sexy, seduction, and excitement, or do you put the brakes on? Forbidden Fruit can be a game changer, will you taste of its intoxicating nectar? What makes you choose the road that you decide to take, only you can answer that.

XOXO
Bliss

Thermal Thursday (Candy Babes)

It’s Thermal Thursday because Candy Babes are HOT!
As you know, I’m on a fitness journey and I find tons of ways to get my exercise in, some ways would be considered traditional while others although popular, are still not really mainstream. I have a personal trainer, and I go to the gym, as well as walking/trotting in my neighborhood. Those are all the more traditional methods.
Now for the just off mainstream or more progressive things I do to get my fitness fix. I attend a variety of classes at Fit Candy Studios. My favorite classes would be Pole Choreography, Bootylicious, Rockin Socks, and Cardio Candy Boot Camp. Pole Choreography although it’s a sexy flirty choreographed dance routine, is also a nice workout. And the instructor Eye Candy, puts her own special touch on each class. She is super sexy and has such a fun personality; she really keeps you engaged as she teaches. After you learn the routine and run it several times…yep you can feel it. In the routines you are strutting in your heels, spinning, crawling and getting it in sexy style.

Rockin Socks is a new fav high energy fun dances that provides a cardio workout, coupled with body weight exercises, LOVE it, and YES, we do it all in our socks!! It’s a super cute fun calorie burner.

Bootcamp Babes, is another intense yet fun cardio infused bad ass calorie burner. Candy Babes in BEAST Mode!

Finally, there is Bootylicious, bae-bay I’m gonna need to take my time with this one. Picture if you will a room full of lovelies various shapes and sizes in varying stages of dress poised and ready to learn how to restructure, tone, and tame, what has been called, milkshakes, donkeys, onions, moneymakers, hams, junk-in-the-trunk, fatties, and of course, booty’s! The instructor Fly Girl uses a variety of tricks to tighten and tone our booty’s, hips and thighs. The one that causes the most giggles, and voyeuristic tendencies would be the isolation movements, you know, right check, left check, both check movements. It’s a dignified “twerk” of sorts if you will. Now this can be tricky and not everyone gets it at first, it does take practice to become the conductor of your own booty symphony! Keep in mind it matters not the size of your “assests” it still needs to under your control at all times.

So here’s the set up, you have Fly Girl in the front of the class and she gives verbal instructions on just what we are supposed to do. Oh did I mention the lights are low and so are we,(seated position) the music is hype, 2 Chainz…IJS. The students begin to attempt to conduct their symphonies…then you start to here “I don’t think mine is moving” from all corners of the class and the giggles start. And then you hear, “Is MINE moving?” “It doesn’t feel like it”;“ YEAH, girl it’s moving”, more giggles, so our lovely instructor seeing the confusion, kindly demonstrates the movements…(muffled cough saying this under my breath “Two hams wrestling in her shorts” )lmao!! Then she makes her rounds assisting students and encouraging them to keep trying. So for those of us who have taken the class for a while there are these looks of PURE business on our faces as we compose our concertos! Although there are mirrors in front of us, Yep you guessed it we are all “Looking back at it”. Fly Girl returns to her spot up front to get her symphony started and all eyes are on her “Percussion section” lol lol. She holds a BM degree (Booty Masters) in Bootyology and her skill set is immediately recognized!! You start to hear the “Wows” in the class, and “Am I supposed to being doing THAT?” Now I’m generally pretty close to Fly Girl in class and baebay when I tell you she needs to change her name from Fly Girl to NBA, National Basketball Association , (YES,THAT one) …she should!! Why you may ask, well because that Mama looks like she’s dribbling two (2) basketballs behind her back …IN her shorts! You know like when you dribble really low and fast, umm hum, yep like that! And then you know if that ball handler has skills they can dribble one a bit slower than the other, switch the rhythm and change directions without missing a beat…umm humm girlie has those kinda skills. And get this during the last class, she tried to cover it up because “Someone was teasing her” I don’t recall who at the moment (blinks innocently) with her jacket can you say FAIL! Looked like two kids playing under the covers…lmao!! Okay, but seriously she is AWESOME at what she does. I aspire to hold a BM in Bootyology myself one day. This class is sooo much FUN and you can definitely tell that you are putting in work.

Keep in mind the classes I mentioned are just my personal favorite classes there are many more classes to choose from there, and one is the ever popular Zumba, and many classes that are unique to Fit Candy, like Chair Vixens. You should really stop by her website and or Facebook page for more information on what Fit Candy Studio has to offer.

I love going to the studio, the staff is great and the students are friendly. It’s a real sisterhood there. It’s a great place to get a fun effective workout, and meet some awesome ladies! It’s also a place of self discovery; you begin to remember that you can be sexy even though you are a mom, and working wife, stay at home mom, or if you constantly put yourself on the back burner. Take time for you, and take care of you, in a friendly encouraging, confidence building atmosphere. Become a member of the Fit Candy family!

Surreal Sunday

My need for it grows with each passing day…
I still remember the last time we were together; it was a beautiful summer day…
My chest heaved with excitement as I prepared for our encounter, rushing from closet to mirror first this, then that, it has to be perfect.
I remember the beginning of the journey, but quickly move into auto pilot as thoughts of our past rendezvous cause my lips to involuntarily curl at its corners, and I blush.
Trickles of wondering sweat run from my neck into places that longed to be caresses by what awaits.
Still fresh is the feeling of anticipation, seeing, touching, inhaling…tasting, letting go of my inhibitions and becoming one with what lay before me…
My hands trembled as I unbuttoned the buttons on flimsy fabric that hid what lie beneath from what I needed…I had vowed no more hang ups, or cover ups, complete strangers all around, but I had made up my mind this was what I wanted …no what I NEEDED.
I remember how I felt as the fabric fell to my feet, a rush, bold, free…no turning back now.
I remember the excitement I felt, never breaking my gaze on what was in front of me; broad and strong, seemingly never-ending; it commanded my attention hypnotizing me with its gentle rhythmic movements, chills erupt, I can barely contain myself.
I remember my gait hastened as I made my way closer and closer, so close now I can touch.
I remember that first touch sent shockwaves through my body; caused involuntary shivers…I closed my eyes, head back, appreciating.
Weak, surrendering, on my knees, to all it had to offer embracing it totally, its familiar aroma assaulting my sense of smell, I inhaled, deeply.
It was wet on my lips, again assaulting my senses, licking my lips, tasting the saltiness…surrendering completely, nothing else matters, we are one.
Soaked, dripping…I’m transported.
Rolling, intertwined as one, laughing from pure joy. Strong and all encompassing, I’m tossed by its rhythmic movements, I’m light as a feather, high as a kite. Sounds that fail to describe my true bliss escape my lips. To infinity is where I want to ride this wave of pure satisfaction, floating.
There’s a recession, I open my eyes, my breath escapes me, I’m exposed. Slowly composure returns. The voyeuristic eyes of strangers are all around, did they see? I’m as giddy as a teenager in love.
Everyone should be so lucky to experience the perfect day at the beach.

Thankful Thursday…

So in my world it’s Thankful Thursday…
Yes, I am thankful for all the usual things that one is thankful for, life, kids, health, parents, family and friends and their well-being, most definitely.
But I’m also thankful for being just a little bit different from others. How you may or may not ask.
Well for starters I’m sorta the odd ball in my circle in that I’m the only single person everyone else is married, not a thing in the world wrong with marriage in fact I hope to marry again …one day. Not only am I “The Single One” I’m the oldest in that group. At ## years old I am experiencing life as most did in their 20’s, kind of footloose and fancy free; although I have 3 teenagers (monkey wrench). This is my first time living alone because I went from my mom’s house to my husband’s house at 21, and that is where I remained until his passing almost 5 years ago. Now the thankful part with this piece is that I am STILL living, discovering, laughing, and embracing what life throws my way. Not everyone can say that. Some are mired down in their daily lives and don’t even know what day of the week it is. Or bills are weighing heavy and the stress of it all is shutting them down little by little. Or they hate their jobs, their spouses and everything that surrounds them. They are in the quicksand that is their life. They are in these long ass unfulfilling relationships and want out but can’t find the courage to leave. They either stay for convenience or for the kids or both. While this dead-end existence sucks the joy and life right out of them, day by depressing day, they choose to remain in it. We all know at least one or two people who are in that quicksand. But THANK GOD THAT IS NOT ME! Yes, I’m single BUT I can mingle as I choose to or not to, I have that choice that freedom, that some crave but are afraid to obtain. When your life is over and you have been unhappy for most of it…that to me is a life wasted. So that being said I’m thankful for freedom, choice, and chances.
I know people who are afraid to take a different route to work let alone try something new and fun in their personal lives. I caught some side eyes when I decided to pole but I didn’t care, it was/is fun and freeing and gives a sense of accomplishment especially when you get a move that you have been working on forever. When you can see yourself come out of a shell and think ok I can be sexy! I’ve learned how to look at myself and think dayum gurl that was hottt! And poling was just one of the new things I have tried out over these last few years. So with this piece I am thankful the courage to try something new despite the side eyes I get. I am thankful my sense of adventure, and my carefree attitude.
It’s hard as hell raising teen boys without their dad or a positive fulltime male role model. This is the hardest thing I have had to do in MY LIFE!! One is narcissistic and the other ODD (oppositional defiant) Opposite ends of the spectrum, somewhat. Each possesses their own special challenges. With one you want to break all the mirrors in the house and tattoo on his forehead “The world DOES NOT revolve around you” (maybe I should do that and keep the mirrors) and the other I’m thinking Jesus be my fist so when I hit this boy in his chest it can be all-powerful and he can just feel it flow through his ENTIRE body!!Yeah, I want him to get the “Glow” you know like Leroy…The Last Dragon…(Google it) Oh and a girl child who sits back in the cut and instigates!! I just need Jesus to be some duct tape for her. Who knew life could get this hard? But so far I’m surviving and so are they. And since I’ve been on this journey with them I’ve heard horror stories about teens gone wrong; but so far we haven’t made the news, so for THAT I’m thankful. Another thankful piece with this is, although I’m discovering myself, I’m still able to help them through their journey and love and support them as though they are angels. For that I am thankful. And I’m just plain ol’ thankful for them because without THEM there was a time when I could not think of a reason to get up out of bed other than they needed me.

And finally I’m thankful YOU came here to my little blog to read this…XOXO
Bliss

Maddening Monday…The Weigh-in

Hummm sooo today isn’t the best day at Get Right Get Tight headquarters 😦 and it’s really got me feeling some kinda way!! So the numbers on the scale decided to go all freakin Cha Cha Slide and shit and when it heard Reverse Reverse, it enthusiastically did just that. The disloyal bastard!! I want to rip its battery out of its back so it can feel the same pain it caused me when it ripped my heart out when I saw those numbers this morning!! I have been exercising AND eating right last week so I’m not sure exactly what happened. And although the disappointment was palpable by all those present at the weigh-in, not much I can do about it now except, regroup let it go, and push harder for next weeks encounter with that backstabbing bastard! So I’m pushing for a 3-4lbs lost in this upcoming week. That’s ambitious for me! So I need y’all to send tons of fat fighting energy my way!

It’s days like today that really test ones dedication to the journey. I say that because I know that although I was not perfect with my diet, I was not off the wagon either. And I sure as HELL didn’t eat no 8,750 calories in 1(One) dang day!

The worst part for me is that today I feel like my trainer was more disappointed than I was. That too made me feel some kind of way …and that way was NOT happy. Almost like your dad being disappointed in his little angel. Argh, gotta shake that off as well, and put up some numbers next week that blows both our minds! Thats gonna mean 2 a days with more cardio :-?. Summer IS right around the corner I want to show a little skin, as well as start my Pole level classes again!! Umm hummm I said start Poling again. Don’t judge me…..JOIN me!

Get Right Get Tight